Clear Lists
Get the app →
Long Distance Relationship Ideas
Calls, letters and plans to keep two cities feeling close, plus the conversation to have first.
A real, editable checklist below — tick, tap a line to rewrite, drag to reorder.
Tick the circles, tap any line to change it, drag the dots to reorder.
Saved in this browser. Send it to Clear to keep it on your phone.
The sources keep coming back to one rule: say what you expect. How often you'll talk, from daily contact to a long call every few days, and whether you plan to live in the same city one day. Settle that first. One writer in the Liberty University post kept video calls to one every few days so each felt like a date night. The ideas below are mostly things to do over a call, plus a few for visits. They leave out advice on whether to stay together.
Why these items are on the list
- Say your expectations out loud. Unspoken expectations can lead to let down and disconnect, says Relationship School. Get them on the table early.
- Agree how often to talk. Some people want daily contact, others far less. Neither is wrong, but match it.
- Plan the next visit. Having something to look forward to makes the weeks apart easier.
- Start a relationship bucket list. Trips and food spots you'll do once you're in the same place.
- Keep a reunion countdown. Every day apart is one day closer to the next hug.
- Write 'open when' notes. Pre-written messages for when they need a laugh or a pep talk.
- Film a day in your life. Lets them see the part of your day they usually miss.
- Send a handwritten letter. It's an unexpected gesture and a physical reminder you can keep.
- Cook the same meal on video. Do the things you'd do in one house, just over the call.
- Start a movie at the same moment. Allow for the call lag. One couple, per a Liberty University writer, got the timing down exactly.
- Play Scrabble or an online game. A light, playful way to spend time together, even over a call.
- Have a deep questions night. Lori Gottlieb in goop says go past 'what did you do today' to 'how are you feeling?'
- Take an online quiz together. One couple, per a Liberty University writer, swapped childhood stories and sorted themselves into Hogwarts houses.
- Send a surprise delivery. Their favorite coffee to the door, or a book you think they'd like.
- Share small daily details. A quick voice note about work, or a photo of your lunch.
- Plan how to have hard talks. Pick a time and a way. A Liberty University writer says call, since text invites miscommunication.
- Schedule regular check-ins. Leave room for spontaneous calls too.
- Keep your own hobbies going. Time with friends and family keeps you independent, not waiting by the phone.
- Dress up for a video date. Light a candle and put on music so it feels like a night out.
- Pull off a surprise visit. One last-minute visit can break up both of your weeks, if you can manage it.
- Talk about closing the distance. Revisit future plans regularly so you both know where this is heading.
Keep the list open on your phone during a call and tick off what you've tried, so date night doesn't turn into the same chat as last week. Send it to your partner so you both can tick along.
When to use it
Useful when you start a long distance stretch, or when calls have started to feel like routine.